I also neglected to add something important: MUCH of my (more aggressive) approach centers around the expediency of the fact that MOST LBSs can't handle prolonged (longer than 6 months) deceit and infidelity. To men, especially, it can be emasculating.
But I have ALWAYS said, that -- if you CAN -- then you should do the "pure DB" approach. SmileysPerson is a great example that comes to mind, as he seems to be handling it well. Everyone has a different "breaking point." For some it's only one month; others can go two or three years. I just don't think that most people can handle it for any length of time, and then when you factor in the destructive (finances, etc.) factors mentioned above, I usually come down on the side of more aggressive, vs. less so.
