You are so right about the name calling. When I was writing out my list of things that she might have found appealing about the OM, it came down to one thing...he treated her like an individual.
So what I've decided to do is to treat her like a woman when we interact. No pet names, but her first name. Every day I make it a point to ask her how her day was even when I don't get the same. I try to give her little compliments here and there so they don't seem like I'm sucking up to her.
And I have been trying to see things through her eyes when I'm dealing with her so that I can react compassionately.
One example was last night when she didn't want to talk to my Mom in the hospital. I was disappointed but I didn't make a big deal about it like I would have in the past. I figured she was a bit ashamed to talk to my mom at the time. Then I went back and made the conversation as light and fun as possible. I think she was relieved about that because she lightened up quite a bit after.
I'm combining that with GALing so that it gives her the space she needs to work on herself. I hope it's working.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
