I can't imagine doing this with kids. There are times when, against my best judgement and reasoning, I wish our little boy had lived because even if this had happend, I would have loved to have him, to love. Still, I know that its for the best that we don't have children at this point and with all that you and others are going through trying to parent within this process...I wish you all the stength in the world.
thank you for writing to me. I do want to move forward. I want to stop feeling like this. Like you said, maybe he will meet me one day, or maybe someone else will. At this point, it is actually getting easier to picture someone other than H, and maybe that's for the best.
I'm embarrassed to admit that I think I get caught up in our whole story, in the idea of it coming full circle, of "this has to be happening for a reason, so we can come out stronger". Like this is some epic thing...ridiculous.
I wish you peace and clairity tonight(saw that your sitch is really wearing on you), and for you and your boys to be well.
Me 30 H 33 together:10 years married:5 years Separated: 1/23/09 living apart 5 mos and counting "when you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on"-FDR
