As I have said in past posts to you, having her in the house is to your advantage. I know it is hard and you see her all the time and want & need her sexually. However, it would be soooo much worse if she or you were to leave the home. Trust me about that. One of the greatest problems I see you having is acting friend-ly toward her. You are not to be cold! Being detached is not being cold. I don't know why men can't seem to get that, but you are shooting yourself in the foot everytime you give her the "cold treatment". You can still be friendly toward her but detach yourself physically by giving her space and detach yourself emotionally by GAL and stop focusing on her 24/7. But nowhere in this DB technique are you to act "cold"!
Stuck - I agree with Sandi 100% on this one. I know in my situation, my wife was hell bent on leaving to the point she even called a realtor to sell our house. So I took the "caged animal" approach and opened the door, as you were full aware of how that came about/went.
My DB coach had said that keeping in the house was very important, but having her feel trapped was not a good thing either. I didn't get the detached vs. cold thing either. I still don't but am getting a better understanding of it each time I read the posts.
So please heed Sandi's advice here. It has been a long time that someone posted something positive in their situation, I just hope that you will have that opportunity.
Stay the course and been the man.
Take care
Me 41 WAW 36 S 3&7 M 10 yrs W files D 1/9/09 W moves out 4/18 Lost job 6/15 New job 7/27 Disc PA 8/10 (started Nov 2008!) Confronted 8/11 Admits PA & appologies for hurt 9/11 Lost Job 11/13
