Kimmie and Sandi this post is for the both of you. (Sandi I will post to you personally in a bit). First, I DO appreciate all the effort and the things you are trying to do for me, I cant say that enough. Now...the both of you have said that I am listening and doing nothing to help myself. At the risk of sounding stupid and totally confused, truly I dont know what things you all and others on here "want me to do????", really I dont.
I have went back to college to get a degree in nursing (starting in Aug)
I go out EVERY nite almost, either to eat with a friend or just to visit with a friend, or sometimes I have friends over. I never was one to sit at home, even when I was married unless xh and I were watching tv or cooking, he fished alot or was at the fire dept., so I either went with him or went to friends.
Also, I have been tanning. Got a New Hairstyle Losing Weight Going to Church Working around the house...finally! Trying to find a better paying job! Getting ready to start my photography again Checked into Digital Scrapbook Designs (may be a consultant) and other little things.
Honestly please tell me what more can I do. I am just either stupid or just plain dumb, because I am misunderstanding what everyone here is saying. Everyone is telling me to GAL but I keep saying I am, but no ones seems to understand that. Yes, I love my xh and I can not stop that as much as I wish I could. And yes I post alot about him because I think of him alot and cant seem to get past that part. I wish almost every day to have my family back, yes even after what he has done. I pray for him to be healed of whatever happened with him and for us to start a new 20 years. I know, however that he has to make that move and I can NOT force him. Guys, I do have good days, the crying has ceased (except for that very bad time of the month), and I dont walk around in a daze, but at the same time, I am not jumping for joy that I am single again. To be honest, I dont know when I will want another man, I wish I had a man, my man, but not another one.
I am sorry if I sound ungrateful, but I just dont understand.
