To be more specific, as I should have done to begin with, this was the part that I found particularly off-putting:
Originally Posted By: Mike in Phx
and built a pile of stuff that includes a bracelet she just bought me, a few special rings we bought together, an emblem of out initial love and my wedding ring with a note that says "These belong to you again"; she'll probably see this on Monday.
That, IMHO, serves no useful purpose at all. If you have (or think you might just possibly have when you've processed a bit more) any hope of salvaging this marriage, I'll reiterate my suggestion that you rethink this.
Point taken, I'll think about how to address this. I'm hearing that she is really scared because she's lost the OM and she's losing me now; I feel like the wheel is in my hands for the first time. My point with the pile is to make a statement about just how ready I am to walk away at this point (and I am). She needs to come to the table and do a lot of the heavy lifting now, be honest, come clean about everything and start showing that she is doing the work because it's been all me up 'til now. The pile reinforces the shock and awe but I do recognize that it might be a little over the top; I'll reconsider. She wants to talk tonight, I'm not sure I'm ready to (although I do want to get acces to all the email accounts and history). Thoughts....????
