He does not want HIMSELF. Thus the reason for going thru relationships like I go thru margaritas on a fun night!!!
You know this. But, I figured you needed to hear it again.
Why aren't you loving yourself enough to be able to say, "He's choosing BENEATH me?"
And yes, he gets to have fun. But you get the love and respect of those wonderful children. You win.
I will allow this momentary lapse of yours. Next time, I come down there and kick your ass. If I could catch up to you! You're fit, you're smart, you're beautiful. Snap out of it, sweetie. You are far too valuable for this line of thinking!!!
momentary lapsse and then... we keep getting too close to what it is.
ran into a gal x had recently dated for a short time. awkard. spoke with x for a couple hours the other day - no anger on my side anymore that is so nice..he is apprehensive...he told me is just waiting for me to attack... again he has good reason for that but it has been over a year since i have done anything stupid...but to him he remembers it well.
we get along. we can laugh. we can share stories of his life - some of mine. he talks of suicide still. he continues to admit he is really messed up. he keeps choosing this path.
i am sad - i miss him. he does know what he has lost -- but still is seeking the happiness that he said he was searching for when he left.
sad.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Checking up on you my friend. Hope you are doing ok. Looking at being up by you maybe in October, it depends how my job searching goes though.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
the only place I can come and vent and not be known..
ugh..boo hoo and yeah all that jazz.
he has ANOTHER new girlfriend. How do i know? cause we get into conversations.. i am trying to be "all ok with everything.." and i ask... and he shares...
bimbo is officially done. she called asked for money and begged to see him.. he said no more. So you know -- it took almost 2 years for it to end.. since the original break-up where her mom moved her out he has had numerous women and i think 4 possible "girlfriends.." and now here we are again...
he knew i was going on a date tonight - and tomorrow -- i looked dang good tongiht..he was even taken back a little when he walked in to get d12. then low and behold middate night i got a text.. he has a fever and is sick.. just wanted to give me a "heads up".... Whatever. I called d12 on my way home from teh date.. a few hours after the text... didn't respond to his.... no need.. i was on a date and everyone is ok.
i am just frustrated.... woman after woman .. try after try.. but he doesnt even want me??!!! and does he even wonder? does he even look at me that way at all??!! i have to say no...i dont think he seess me with those eyes at all.... i am nothing.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
IT IS NOT YOU...this is all about him.....I DO THINK YOU KNOW THAT......He is one lost man
I still do think that at some point and some day this type of man will regret it and kick himslef...but he is too lost right now....cant get out of the maze
took my daughter to church - then she headed off to camp. my son has moved out and is doing the "grown-up" college life.. and here i am.
after coming home from church i was exhausted. slept for a couple of hours yes HOURS! went out to the pool -- and had an AH HA moment. I knew I recognized the heaviness, the lethargic stuff.. yep that stupid thing called depression.
the GREAT thing about it is that i know "this too shall pass"... fathers day - family day -- yep bugs me gets into the heart..NOT the head anymore... the head knows and the heart is learning.
I made it through what would have been my 22nd anniversary .. think only 1 tear -- if that. Made it through another "holiday" fathers day.
and so so happy about tomorrow!! WHY? Cause it is a new day!!
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
all the girlfriends you are right they are not reasdy to give up the fight they wanted life their way--fun no responsibilities ect it is ok when you are a teen--but now in youe 40's you chose to lose it all they will grow up broke and alone b/c soon the OW that will consider dating them will be bottom feeders and no one you would ever want to be with sad to say but many will never consider return mine probably wont ( dont know If I really care anymore) to return means to let go of that fantasy they had that Life could be Fun all the time?? instead of realizing life is difficult and can be fun at times peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
