also saying i didn't approve of her talking to him specifically may only have made her to do it more, so that's why i didn't.
Oh please. Is she your wife, or not??
You're showing WEAKNESS, in my opinion, and a woman will never respect weakness. And, women tie their feelings of "respect" VERY closely to their feelings of "love."
If you want to be more attractive to her, I suggest you look for ways you can exhibit STRENGTH, RESOLVE and CHARACTER to her.