And its not that I have not forgiven myself it is her that continues to carry it around and use it as a shield or a defense mechanism and that is what irritates me and wants me to just say "get the fu** over it already."
I agree with the shield analogy. Let me see if I can express this correctly - the fact that she can still get a reaction out of you is why I said forgive yourself. You have made great positive changes that are now who you are (I think you became the man you always were, the changes were to lose the negativity). Anyways, what I'm suggesting is that you have confidence in YOU - no need to tiptoe around. I know my 'sight' is very limited in this situation, but I still feel like you handle her with kid gloves.
Ah, a cancer....now it makes sense....
WT
I see your point and I am sure there is a small part of me that may still not have forgiven myself so I will work on that.
And yes I am a Cancer and not only that I am on the cusp couple that with my W that is a Leo and she is on the cusp also and you have a great pair.
