Yes. He is saying this because he has an addictive relationship with his therapist. Period. You keep looking for other explanations, and have asked the question fifteen ways from Sunday, EA, but that's your answer. But if you're looking for explanations of why he's doing what he's doing, you need not look any further than the affair.
It's a drug. And until you separate the addict from the source of his addiction, he's going to keep behaving this way. Puppy
Hi, Puppy. Thanks for shaking me again! He hasn't said the "I Love You But..." thing in awhile. He seems very preoccupied with making a choice now---divorce or working on the marriage. He says that the EA is no longer relevant to how he feels about our marriage. According to him, we had problems long before the EAs. He was telling his friends 2+ years ago that he wanted a divorce. Is this more BS to justify all of his unhappiness?
I totally hear you about cutting off the addict! He says that he has NO contact with the therapist. His actions give me hope. He used to have her business card in his wallet (and I'm sure he never knew that I knew that) and it's now gone. He deleted any references to her in his email, both home and work (again not knowing that I could see any of it). Maybe I'm stupid, but I don't think she would jeopardize her job knowing that I'll report her. When I screamed and swore at her in public, she got the message that I'm a woman who will not be played. I made it pretty clear that I still have evidence against them and WILL use it. I told H that I can't be in this marriage with three people. Now he wants to go to counseling this week. I can access his cell phones, Gmail and work email accounts. But he could always have another Gmail account.
Any advice on bringing this up in counseling this week?
Me 39, H 41 M 17, T 21 Son, 4 Bomb 2.09, Two EAs Separated 8.4.09 My Long Story and First Postings
