How did you know or notice that the wall you built around you started to slowly come down? Did you notice things more about your H? Did you start treating him nicer?
During your time of doubt, was there ever a time where you found your H not "attractive" physically and emotionally? There was a comment my W made early on about how she was never physically attracted to me and that's how a R should start. I know she probably didn't mean it, but I was wondering about it from a woman's POV.
In case I didn't mention- we didn't recover our marriage. So, alot of my posts come from this perspective.
When I told my H I wanted the divorce he went from never calling me during the day to calling me 10 times a day and having friends call me too. He went from never wanting to touch me unless we were ML to wanting to sit beside me and hold my hand all the time and cuddle after ML. It really creeped me out- because honestly I knew he was only doing it to make me stay.
ALthought I was pretty cool about the fact I wanted a divorce I tried to be as civil as I could be to him without giving him hope. I didn't set out to screw him in the divorce ( and I didn't) because I figured I was the one who wanted it so why should I tried to take him for a ride. We have a very fair agreement. I declined his retirement- even though I could have gotten part of it- stuff like that.
During the divorce he sent me hundreds of nasty emails. I never once replied back anything nasty towards him. And, I still haven't. Well, once- when he told the kids to call the new stepmom "mom" the second day they were married- yeah, I blasted him for that but other than that I've never been verbally harsh or abusive with him.
Have you tried doing things that she thought were attractive in the beginning?
