Haha! Boy, I really showed exactly who I am in my early posts, huh? You got it, girl. I do think he should get out of there.
I think it's confusing for the boys. It's a tease for them. The most painful kind of unrequited love. Even though your H does love them, him breezing in and out of their lives must be extremely tough on them. Kids are resilient, blah blah blah. They are just sweet, innocent beings.
Glad you went for a run. That is one of my favorite ways to blow off steam and toughen up.
Hope he respects you enough to pull himself together and move along.
Hope he respects you enough to pull himself together and move along.
Lucky
He doesn't respect himself enough to do it. The weight of progress in this sitch is on me and I feel it. I am not a stupid girl, I get it.
If it takes me a little more time, so be it. I can't shoot blanks. Once I make MY move, I have to have the strength to follow through. Thus, no impulsive moves on my part.
Hope he respects you enough to pull himself together and move along.
Lucky
If it takes me a little more time, so be it. I can't shoot blanks. Once I make MY move, I have to have the strength to follow through. Thus, no impulsive moves on my part.
No impulsive moves is the wisest thing you'll say or do if you ask me.
Quote:
All H had to do was show me that the R mattered to him, that he was paying attention to me and my life and my struggles, that he was there to lift me up, not compete with me. You've got a LOT to work with.
Really? What would he do that would show you he cares? What have YOU done to show him you care? Those are two really important questions you should be able to answer.
I think you're a long way off from making a decision to divorce and sticking to it. I can say it sucks to watch husband kick you out of bed to be with the kids, but I can relate and can say that you DID want him to have a closer relationship with the kids. Are you complaining about that or just venting in general?
What I see is that you are starting to formulate what a marriage would look like for you. What a husband would be like for you. What you would be like for a husband. What you bring to the table so to speak. THAT my dear is progress. That is the subtle kick in the pants I needed to remind me to figure out me as well. I deeply and with the utmost humility thank you for that.
As for sushi - yes I am planning to make a trip sooner rather than later. The two of you are welcome if he's in town. Oh, and if we can figure out the story line properly. Long lost brother? War buddy? (that was supposed to make you laugh).
Keep up the good work. You really are growing and doing very well even in your venting. AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
I feel like in your army of supporters, I'm the "Granny Clampett," standing on your front porch, enraged and yelling, chasing off that no good yellow-bellied varmit with my shotgun.
I feel like in your army of supporters, I'm the "Granny Clampett," standing on your front porch, enraged and yelling, chasing off that no good yellow-bellied varmit with my shotgun.
And, I played it pretty cool despite my inner spinning.
A&K, You posted to Antlers that you were better helping others than yourself. Can you say co-dependent. Take care of yourself. So how to use that to your advantage while you are working on it? Detach and look down on your sitch like you are a outsider and coach yourself, you are on the outside looking in the fishbowl. What would you tell yourself to do? What's holding you back? Choose to love yourself. You can handle it. Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
