Long story for a short question. The question is whether or not I should be using this technique as it really seemed to depress her when she was at home and not wanting to talk or do anything. I really don't like seeing her like this and if there was anything that I could do to make her feel better I would have immediately. Has anyone else experienced this. Maybe she is reconsidering the things she has said and is feeling bad or is she just trying to make me mad so that I can make it easier on her? I really don't know but seeing her this way is really killing me.
This is a whole lot of speculation about what she's thinking and feeling and what YOU can do to make it better for her. You don't control her emotions. You aren't in charge of how she feels. You need to try really hard not to take these non-verbal cues to heart.
The second thing is that when you try something it should result in a positive. You do things that work and discontinue doing things that don't. Would you say that your current strategy is working? This is the hardest part though....is it working or not? I think I'd tone down the LRT a bit, primarily the part about going out very much without a word. It kind of gives the impression you couldn't care less. Find something predictable to do, like join a sport or something. Do some things as a hobby around the house. Pop in and out of her life while showing that you are okay. And you will be okay. If there is something you'd like to do for fun, perhaps casually ask if she'd like to join you. If the answer is no, then go anyway.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. Dr. Wayne Dyer
