yea well theres nothing wrong with hoping and holding onto it. you can do that and go dark at once, if your mentally strong...
just remember to take care of you when going dark... get to a gyom my man! work OUT. go HIKING (that really means just go walking where bikes cant go.) learn to COOK. in fact, become AWESOME. you dont need books just GOOGLE the recipes. then COOK them. amaze yourself. its fun. (I leanrnt to become a really great cook and its the best thing from the breakup ever.) potter in your garden. plant some herbs. be a fool an go to the early morning markets for fruit and veg. GET OUT THERE. and do it alone and do it for you.
and each time you find yourself having fun, and you will, you will think "if only she could see me". but remember its not about her. its about you... getting on and realising theres a pretty wonderful assortment of things to do in this life but you have to actually DO them to realise they are fun.
some things you'll give up on somethings, tho, you will take to and adopt, things surprising even. things you never did before. Go to the horse races, see some car shows, stuff you didnt normally do. its amazing how much is out there you never explored bc you were in a relationship. friends may ask you to a concert or out and you will want to say no, but go. find a new music genre. paint your house. learn to whiten whites. experiement with crepes.
BECOME AWESOME.
When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.
