When I read your post, I thought that it was an honest mistake that probably happens a lot in the beginning of these situations. I would say be honest and state up front that you want to collaborate and communicate, not argue or cause conflict. If you are honest and clearly state your true intentions, then her reactions should be reasonable.
If her reaction is unreasonable, stay calm and loving, and reiterate your intentions. If she is still unreasonable, you will then be confident that it is her issue to recognize and examine.
I should note that I haven't read the entire history of your threads, so please forgive me if my advice is off because it doesn't consider an important detail.
