I think those same thoughts about starting over. My kids & memories keep me from acting on them!

R talk is bad! If you do R talk, never fight about your side. Only say such things as I'm sorry you feel that way, I wish things could have been different, I didn't always make the best choices. Then they feel like they are being HEARD. I know it sucks, but H & I have been going to MC for 4+ months now. I would always talk about my side of the story. Finally in our last session, I started taking the advice I just gave you...and the tone of MC WAS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.

She is taking little or no responsibility. Ah...they will do this...this is when you address all of their issues with you & do 180s! Strip away all of their complaints one by one. It will take awhile for them to acknowledge the changes, but eventually they will have no choice. Once all of their complaints are gone, they are forced to either walk or look in the mirror. Hopefully they will look in the mirror. I think this is where H is right now w/me. Notice my bomb date below, only 2 weeks ago, did he say he accepted 50% of the blame. I have been DBing my butt off!

If they walk, you did EVERYTHING possible.

Me 36, Him 33
M 11yrs, T 15yrs
S 8, D 7
ILYBINILWY - 1/09
H moves out 10/09
D to be final SOON I HOPE!