I've tried to tell him that... that if he wanted to get the feeling back, he just needed to decide to be loving.
When I've told him that, I wasn't telling him that in the most selfless way possible though.
On the same track, I haven't been "feeling" happy for a long time either. But for me, I needed to decide to actually be happy, and to do things for myself - I was turning into a typical martyr wife where everything I did was for my H and DD and I was miserable because nobody did the same for me. How can anyone be happy being married to someone like that and feel loving towards them?
Wow. Lightbulb!! I have been feeling this was my problem in R too, I just haven't really know how to verbalize/articulate it. I did everything re: household stuff and kids. He did the bills. I always thought he should help me more and he did as well. I have known for awhile that we were fighting the same battle against each other. I would also really resent his freedom with his job. And the fact that I have put aside everything for his career...but all of this seems so trivial and stupid and were all erased when he left. I want another chance to flip that switch and appreciate him for the things I resented before...and BE more loving. This is not to say that I am to blame here. But like it was said in another post. It's 50/50...and I am ready to accept 100% of that.
