Ok. I kind of have to laugh. H is late dropping off the kids b/c he had to go to his apt. for checkbook to pay the 2 weeks of art camp he's going to he says. Then he shows up 10 minutes late, and says he left it at his office so I can drive and follow him to his bank and back (at least a 30 minute drive). I said just be sure to bring it tuesday night when he picks up kids. Then he tells me I'm not going the right way to my house. I drive one extra block and then drive down a country road with cows, tobacco barn, etc. Peaceful, nice and goes right to my house. If I turned one block sooner I save a minute on gas & time. So I said thanks, but no thanks or something like that. Just so irritating what a control freak he is sometimes, and if I pulled the late stuff & forgetting the check he would have sent me a couple nasty emails. I just vent here instead. I have to think though you know when he annoys me like this, I'm just glad it's almost over... Karen
What a day! H had emailed a couple days ago about all these pickup/dropoffs this weekend-every day for 4 days. I emailed him several days ago, I didn't want to do so much driving and exchanging the kids (5 times in 4 days). If he wants to take the kids to church he should take them Saturday night instead of Friday night an easy fix.I dropped off the kids yesterday at noon and he said he agreed with me and we'd figure out something.
Today he emails at 8:15 Don't forget to be at the halfway point at 9:45. I turned on the computer at about 9:44 and then raced out the door with the kids to drop them off. I had D9 call H on the way b/c I was focused on trying to get there not too late. Just asked her to tell him we had just left and would be there in about 10 minutes.
He emails me back 3 emails asking me again not to have D9 schedule arrangements (she called him to say we were running late so he'd stay there not arrange anything)> Another that we might have to go to every other weekend the full weekend. Another with a copy of his email with all the 5 pickups/dropoffs that he requested. I did email back only to one, the one about D9 scheduling arrangements. I emailed back that I didn't ask her to do so, just call him to say we were running late, just gotten the email and just left the house. (I think he's going to try to bring that up in court as a negative against me. And then I saved my copy of the email. What does anyone think of this stuff? Am I doing the right stuff do you think? Karen
Hi Karen, I am in similar sitch as you. I keep everything. I document everything. I note conversations. Not sure if I will ever use any of the papaers in my big file, but it has uncovered lies that I may not of picked up on otherwise.
Respond to him with only what requires responding to. He is using up all your energy. Dont buy into his dramas. I would do only what is agreed to and what make slife a little easier for kids.
Karen, the school counsellor told me that it's very ironic that two people who decide to separate because of differences then have to work closely together and communicate effectively with each other so they can co-parent, at a time when they want to have less contact with each other.
I know it's all very tough, with the endless string of e-mails. My H refuse to do any planning at all so we are up in the air most of the time. I have decided to take the bull by the horns and schedule things for US.
In regards to H's multiple requests, there is no way where you can have a REGULAR schedule for the kids? It sounds as though things change every week.
Just a thought so the kids know what to expect every week and is on routine. I think this might work well for everyone involved.
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
I have to agree, make a schedule and stick to it. Sure he wants to "look" like superdad at the moment but at what cost? And heaven forbid his own child would call him while you are driving, oh wait he seems to get mad no matter when she calls...
Get this over with. I will pray that it is done soon.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Yep, his anger is weird. Doesn't seem to like her calling ever. Weird. And listen to this! D9 tells me this am on the way to art camp that Daddy's new friend is giving her swimming lessons and she's been swimming all her life. So looks like OW2. The guy that has the nerve to be upset for me for having D9 call him, is introducing the kids to OW2 when they couldn't have been dating very long. I mean he was dating OW a month ago. He only sees the kids 2 days a week, and he has to combine OW time with them. Can you believe how skanky and gross he is??? And he questions my parenting constantly!!!!
I know I shouldn't be surprised at that. Given OW1's history of several marriages and troubled kids and all; should have expected that. But just can't believe this guy thinks I'm the bad parent!!!! Karen
Why would a female that's just a friend offer to give D9 swimming lessons? Plus, he introduced the kids to OW pretty much right away also. You don't think that?
I have to think though you know when he annoys me like this, I'm just glad it's almost over... Karen
