he was back, i think

[PositivelyMommy]

Hey doodles, I felt the same way exactly for one whole year. But then I asked H, so do you think we can live together as a family again? He refused to give me a definite answer without our C present. Then at C's office, he admitted that he wants this separation to be forever ending in D.

After I got told that to my face, I felt as if a spell has been lifted. Yes, a spell. A kind of love spell. Which I had been under for over 18 years.

The spell lifted and I was free from H. I felt like I was sleeping beauty waking from a deep sleep.

Now, I don't miss him. I see him without the rose-tinted glasses and see the man he is today, not the man I fell in love with.

I rejoice that I am now free. I can make choices that are based on my own happiness.

I don't know if this helps. But I think one day you will need to know a definitive answer from you H. I know you are afraid to ask now because it may not be the answer you want. It will take time but you will be ready one day. And when you get the answer, maybe the spell will be lifted as well.