CityGirl- I agree with everything you've said. The kids do however add an enormous challenge into the mix. For a person who would clearly benefit from NC, it is monumental. That is where the death scenario feels more manageable. The prospect of a future that absolutely must involve the ex, is just so hard to stomach. But, you take it one day at a time and you look at every interaction as a growing experience. There is no way but through. I know plenty of people who have detached and moved on emotionally and they still have to manage their relationships with exes. It is like any other challenge, one you have to face and process and live with. This has been the HARDEST part for me. If H never contacted me again, I could mourn and move on. In these sitches with kids, you have to heal AND manage contact at the same time. It MUST be done.
