H calls me this a.m. Reads the BB chap on "to the wives" which suggests that I not cause him any difficulties, avoid disagreements and not complain. Give him time to learn how to do things. I have no problem with this advise but H is the one who keeps upsetting the apple cart. For ex. I ask that he go on a month to month lease vs another year long one to give us the freedom to move in again when ready and not worry about waiting for a lease to end. H says ok he will do that but only for a few months because it costs too much, then says,well I don't want to move during the winter so you have until Oct/Nov to decide and then I will take a year long lease. Now that his sponsor and IC are saying that the timing is too soon, Feb/Mar is better he blames it on me. He accuses me of turning away from him, of not caring about him and not wanting to live with him.
Second problem, he says he doesn't want his life dictated by my kids'needs - namely we can't afford the condo in a 55 commty that he wants, his solution is for me to sell my house and move into his apt - problem is its one bedroom and we need a second one. Then he says we are stuck in a house that is too big for us because of them and have high bills to pay because of that. One minute says he is having a hard time figuring out how to make amends to my kids for his behavior and then accuses me of not wanting to live with him because I still have to think of my kids' needs for a place to live (albeit it is parttime) Am I the only one confused here?
I don't think it is me - and I think I try my darndest to smooth things over, but he doesn't understand that it is his stuff that comes up and disables our R. ARG!
