I will just clarify that I said that the texting seemed nit pickey. The subject matter does need to be addressed, but the texting never works so why continue down a road that you know leads nowhere?
The bottom line FIB, you need a set parenting plan that you can legally enforce so these interactions become a mute point. When it is your day, it's your day. When it is hers, it's hers. Plain and simple and honestly, in the best interest of your kids.