That's it exactly Tim. I was not completely sure how clearly you had shared your true feelings with her, nor for how long you had been doing so.
I would say often and sincerely enough over the past year that there should be no doubt in her mind how I feel.
With that has been the agreement to not fight her, if and when the time came to separate. I know you never agreed with that, but I guess that was my way of not pursuing, not pushing for anything more from her..to let her fall back in love and realize the changes were for real.
It's too late to second guess all that has happened. It's just decision time.
Do I try to figure out what I did wrong and start over, by the book, or is this a deal breaker?
Right now I don't even have all the information, and may never get it, so I am trying not to dwell while they are still away.
It's been a couple days now since she has text, so who knows where her head is now. I am having a hard time making myself initiate contact.
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How are you doing?
Thinking alot about you and the things that have transpired. I try to tell myself that your wife is a little lost, confused, and maybe even naive, but in the end it always comes back to conscious decisions that are made.
I'm OK...you know how it is..it comes and goes. Work has kept me busy this week. I have the dog at home so not much chance to get out and away.
Maybe she is lost, naive and confused..who knows? She told me when we talked about the text that she knew I could see the log...that she was not stupid and did not want to tell me because I would get the wrong idea. Someone asked if she had reconnected with male and female friends and yes, she has. This guy was not a reconnect, but a chance, accidental meeting online, and I actually remember her telling me about a couple of months ago.
Still trying to figure out how to handle the coming week, our first days together and the info that she is unaware that I have, besides the text logs and phone numbers.
As it gets closer, i get more nervous...more frustrated...more hurt comes out and less anger. Somehow for this one, I feel I need just a little anger...just enough to keep me on my toes...to not lay back and just leave this alone.
