As long as we all accept that "Why are you getting upset?" can be either a genuine request for insight ..... or ..... deliberately-[censored]-disingenuousness.
That said, there's no harm in treating it as a sincere query as long as you don't let it get you off balance. You hate it when she constantly puts the worst possible construction upon your meanings and motives ..... so, sauce for the goose .....
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
