I agree- do not call her- let her come to you. Try to stay busy- make it a minute, an hour, half a day without calling her.
I'm with Sandi about dating. Don't do it. You're still married- and to be honest, your wife acts like such a victim I'm not sure that would bring her around. To me she would take it more as validation for her actions. "Poor me, look hubby is out dating!" yada yada.
You're extremely vulnerable right now and you need to be able to get yourself straight without the involvement of another person. Not fair to you- and not fair to the other person. Plus, you're still married.
