You know I relate. The feelings are what they are. But, this is also time away from your kids, time where you can focus on you and start to cultivate your own interests, friendships, exercise etc.
In some ways, I suspect that your (my) position as MOM sort of overrode theirs as dads. Now, as scary as it is, they are on their own and navigating their own relationships with their kids. Is there any chance that this wasn't happening in the M? This does not mean it is your fault, it means that the Hs didn't know how to be dads and have a voice within the paradigm of family. Just musing.
The hairbrush? Doesn't sound like too big of a deal from my vantage point. But, in my sitch, I can spin on anything involving kiddos. You'll have to get a handle on it and it will take time.
This seems so much more about H and NOT about you. You are not bad to be around, he can't differentiate and define himself with you...he only knows how to be the version of him that was married to you when you're around. Now, he wants to be someone else in a way...or is at least exploring. It is an identity crisis of sorts. That's just IMO.
