Happy Birthday. I understand the ML part even though you really don't want to you do and it's a way, maybe the ultimate way, to be close to someone. How did you feel afterward I think should help you determine if you will be doing that again. I'm no expert on this stuff, looks like marriage is ending. But looking back I wish I could have done a better job at shutting up and being more happy and light around him. So please, shut up. Lighten up. Take care of you and he'll see that. That's really the only thing that will bring him back....if you show him happiness is with you because you are happy with yourself. That takes the pressure off of him to make you happy which is a lot of pressure.
