My W told me "I wish you would find someone already!"
I think that was her way of saying...back off. I just flipped that back at her and said that was disrespectful to our Ds and to me who just want her and not another mother. I also told her that she was being disrespectful to herself because it was like saying, find someone better than me. After that, she never brought it up again.
I think they say that about us having another person (when our Ss have had an A) so it makes what they did much more acceptable.
Your wife is in love with her feelings right now. When you say something that is the opposite of what she thinks & feels you are against her. If you are against her, anything you say will be met with opposition and don't mistake her silence for agreement with you.
The next time she says something like this or anything else for that matter, reply back "you are right, I'm going to start looking soon, I need someone better for me" and leave it at that and walk away.
In fact anything she says, just agree with. If she says the sky is red and it's blue, tell her she's right, it's red. If she says you're a bum and the reason for the marriage problems, tell her she's right, you are the worst person in the world, stop defending yourself and if she says that maybe she should leave, you agree with her (because you won't be moving anytime soon) and offer to help her move out.
If she says something you don't agree with, just agree.
Do the opposite of everything you're currently doing with her. If you're super nice and anti-drama, stop being super nice and start generating some drama.
Mix it up a bit, seriously at this point, you have nothing left to lose, it's all experimentation now... and let go of your current mindset when it comes to dealing with these problems - none of what you are doing is working so start doing something that will work otherwise you can look forward to experiencing the same results you are currently generating with your existing methods.
