Well I went by my W's and SIL's place to grab more of my stuff and catch up. I immediately started getting boxes together because I thought she had to get the SIL from work. She asked "hey aren't we going to talk?" So instead we went for a walk and mainly talked about family and work. There were times she seemed open and later she got a little more clammed up and acted aloof but morose. We got back to the apartment and she went on to pick up SIL. I packed boxes and my car while she did that. When they got back and I was done packing I went upstairs to their study area where they were watching TV and my W was sewing some crafts. I joined them and my W seemed to try to ignore me but our eyes kept meeting. I tried to chat with them both but it is hard to insert convo between 2 twin sisters. Especially them. I sat there with them occaisionally they would say something or I would. I got kind of mad since I wanted to talk to W without SIL being around. So I announced that I had to go ahead and go. When I went downstairs my W came down and was upset and said I thought we were going to talk? I went ahead and told her that I couldn't converse with her like I wanted to while SIL was around and I wanted to talk to her. So We sit down downstairs and try to chat. It is a little strained but it warmed up a little. My W seemed very morose most of the convo though and had this kind of pleading look in her eyes. I just acted casual and comfy and eventually she asked if WE (yes We) should go ahead and file. That confused me. It is like she is trying to use some of my strength to go through with this. I told her it was up to her to file. I said in my opinion we should just stay separated and see what happens. She said ok! I told her that my door was still open and that I did miss her (maybe bad but didn't say I love you). I told her she looked good and all her working out was paying off. She told me I looked good too. It did seem like there was a moment she was checking me out and after that she got really nervous, antsy, and more morose. I made sure I kept eye contact with her as much as possible btw. We were able to share some laughs as well and she did ask about my job promotion. There was a time when she got really cold and turned down the ac. I got the impression she wished she could be held but of course I didn't initiate that. I asked if she wanted to play some Rockband because doing something physical would warm us up. She said she didn't because she wasn't in the mood.. perhaps some other time. I did finally say I was going to leave and she followed me. I wonder if she hoped I would initiate a hug and I didn't. She said bye and said I hope inventory doesn't take too much of a toll on you (my store's inventory is tonight - overnight shift.. yuck). Anyway I think this went fairly well. I hope so and I am wondering if she is starting to miss me and wonder if she can go through with D. The reality of the sitch may just be setting in for her. Now then should I be kind of unavailable for the next few days??
