Unfortunately, our R is going to become even more strained due to some uncomfortable constraints I have to put on my wife.
Up to know I have enabled her current lifestyle by paying for everything, while she has consistently purchased items for her and the home, the main reason being I was trying to appease my W and not upset her with demands for financial assistance during this difficult period. Her life has not really missed a heartbeat while mine has completely gone topsy turvy.
Without being bitter, mean or nasty I must now initiate steps that will send my W ballistic but are neccessary - she must now start to take financial responsibility for her actions. I am going to propose to her she will now have to pay half of the mortgage and half of the rates. As I am moving back to the marital home as she moves out I will pay the local utility bills. I will also provide for the children but as we are now seperate people she will have to fund her percentage of the above.
It makes no difference to me whether this improves or worsens our R. As you have said PM she is not one bit interested in our R, therefore for my own self esteem and respect I have to say enough is enough.
She will scream, she will cry, she will tell anybody that listens that I am being a selfish bas**** as I always have been, but I have tried to face this living hell with as much morality and dignity as possible, even to the point where I have given her �100,000 that strictly speaking should go into the pot of money so that she and the children can stay in the family home.
It saddens me to think it is going to get nasty, but there was always a degree of inevitability about the way this was going to go. I will remain calm and I will try to be as fair as I can, but as you said I have to re-build my life and I have to protect myself financially.
It was always going to get worse before it gets better, so I just need to prepare for it.
I hope you, like me can get through this as best we can for ourselves and our children.
Best wishes,
Mark
Bomb dropped: 19/12/08 Me:48 WAW:41 D:10 S:6 Married: 15 years
