WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 10

[confusedinpa]

It's a Standers Affirmation that helps me stay focused on myself and what I'm doing.

This is where I am so torn as to what's been offered recently. I know some have said there is no hope so for the health of myself and my kids, I need to be prepared for a life without my wife. So by preparing for a life without my wife, am I, by default giving up?

I am not giving up as I will work on our marriage as soon as my wife says she wants to as well. I am trying to "attract" her back, which is where I am at odds with Dark. How attractive is Dark? Mysterious perhaps? Annoying perhaps? Attractive? I've heard the James Bond analogy, but even he, while acting stand offish is flirting, charming, charismatic and friendly.

On the flip side, I'm trying to not be needy as that is not attractive either.

Perhaps this is the nuance the Wifey had talked about.

Be prepared to live my life well with my boys while making myself attractive to my wife.

This is where I need to drop the rope to earn my self confidence and self respect back. To detach to improve my own emotional health. Because isn't self confident, self respecting and emotionally healthy individual much more attractive than a needy, emotional wreck?

This is a fine line to balance.

Either way, I am off to pick up my boys to come home. I will remember my goal of not letting the situation be a distraction while we are together.

So confusing. So many questions.....