In Utter Agony...Long 1st Post

[eternaloptimist]

Oh trust me, he's noticed. I'm a guy -- I know. The problem is, as long as OW and he are in contact, he will continue to waffle back and forth, and he will be much more (entirely?) shut off to you emotionally. That's why 100% no-contact, backed by full and voluntary transparency, is so important. Puppy

Thanks for this, Puppy! I do feel more confident, even if he hasn't noticed enough to compliment me or to initiate any intimacy. Initiating sex was a 180 for me that I tried already; he rejected me. But that's ok...going slow, right? My ego can take it b/c tons of men and ladies I work with have complimented me on my "makeover." I have done 180s with all aspects of my appearance. A few weeks ago, I ditched wearing any grandma-like undergarments KWIM? I started wearing tasteful (nothing too revealing) lingerie w/matching thongs (big 180!) around the house, push-up bras, etc. I make sure to change when he is nearby so that he can see the new toned and fit me. It has done wonders for my ego!

Last night we had our financial talk... I'll post that in the infidelity section. He came clean on everything w/his therapist...as transparent as a sauteed onion now and no contact!