So...in regards to the schedule with the kids...we have a loose schedule that I put into motion which is he picks them up Tuesdayss and Thursdays and we are going to switch off every other weekend. Last weekend was his first with them alone, and it was when he started texting me some "hopeful" texts. So...this week, Tuesday I requested that we switch and he could pick them up Wed instead because of a party for D6's Girl Scouts that I forgot about. So Tuesday he did not pick them up and i didn't talk to him at all...(mon or Tues.)...then Tues night he sent me that text saying he missed me...blah blah blah. Yesterday (wed) I had to pick them up from school and he came over to pick them up after he got off of work, and here is what happened. I was dozing off on the couch when he arrived, and my girls were in time outs in seperate rooms upstairs. (they were fighting!) H flopped onto the couch when he came in...and we talked for about 20 minutes. Lighthearted and I would dare to say even flirty...we both laughed alot and H expressed feelings of being stressed. H also told me that when the kids were at his house for the weekend he got on D8 for something...smacked her upside the head...and felt really bad. He said he didn't know why he overreacted, and was upset about it. Anyway, I just listened to him and it was a good convo. Then he rolls over and cuddles up to me, and I think you know where that lead. I told him we probably shouldn't do it and he asked if it would be too upsetting for me. I said maybe, but I wanted to be with him. He carried me upstairs and the rest is history. We showered together, (sorry if its too much info), and then I thought he would leave, but he layed back down on the bed and fell asleep. I let him sleep for about an hour then I woke him up and told him I had to go. I left and went to yoga and then over to a friends house for a glass of wine. My attitude was never emotional, and all I felt was happiness. Truly. So, I told him he could stay with the kids at the house and he did (since he was going to be dropping them back off in a couple of hours anyway) and he thanked me for letting him do that. When I got home, he was watching TV and I sat down and we talked a little bit...the kids came down and we all laughed together and they said their goodbyes. He hugged me and then left...and for the first time I felt ok with him leaving, not sad. I don't know if this was a good thing or not. It felt positive. Like he left, knowing that he could have this life...it was fun, sexy, and HOME. Then off he went to his lonely place. Couldn't have felt good for him. And I am fine with that. His loss. I know that I could have chosen to play hard to get...and not give in to the temptation of being together. I don't know...but I didn't feel bad after and I think I played everything else just right. We'll see. I will see him today at drop off and I am planning on looking REALLY hot. Then I will see him tomorrow and then will go dark for the whole weekend. That is my plan!!!!!!
