What's wrong with 2x4s, and why is everyone looking at me???
Awe Puppy, yours are to the point and prodding, but I have never minded yours. They seem to land without causing a bruise. I have never seen you be mean in the least. The ones that bother me are the ones that bash some newbie over the head for not getting the script right out of the gate.
You get a little pushier when you need to, and often with the person's own words. But your tone never seems to cross the line and make the person feel like a failure. It usually more like, come on - I know you can do better. At least that's how I always saw them.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
You might consider that you don't need to be a doormat to be a welcome mat. I hope you think through things and come back refreshed, no matter what you decide. No one has a right to tell you which way to go, because only you know. Either way, we are here.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
oldtimer, you asked so I will try to summerize what I think is going on in my sitch as best I can.
My H is doing what he has done each time in the past. He wants to take back everything that has happened, say he loves me and continue on. Of course he thinks that will work because it always has in the past. BUT it won't this time. I love him and want him to be my H but only if we can have a passionate marriage based on respect, trust and honesty.
I think he would benefit from IC and we would need MC. But I can not make that choice for him, it must be something he wants and seeks out. It would be a long (probably) very hard road, but I believe that God can work miracles.
There are a few things that are different from the past times. H and I are truly talking and sharing things.
I have gotten up off the floor and will no longer be a doormat, but I will keep the welcome mat out.
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
