he knows ME, inside and out, and I don't feel the need to adjust who I am in front of him in any kind of inauthentic way.
And of course this implies that one doesn't change over time, that the You of 2009 is the You of 1989 or 99.
But isn't it the very essence of marriage that one of the challenges that so often leads to divorce is the fact that one spouse grows in one direction while the other grows in a different one -- or, indeed, doesn't grow at all -- over the course of the life?
Electric word, life; it means "forever," and that's a mighty long time.
Which means, among other things, that one is constantly "meeting" one's spouse over-and-over again, learning to adjust, accommodate and renegotiate the social rules of the marriage and, therefore, that H/W can't, by definition, know you inside and out, because inside and out you change. Nearly every damn day.
