You will need that faith and commitment because if you think this part of the process is bad, you ain't seen nothing yet. Your feelings will go through so many more ups and downs, you will need your faith to serve as an anchor through all of it.
Stuck
Ack! You mean it gets harder from here?!?!?!
I'm really torn on how much hope that I hold onto. Sandi's message really painted a bleek picture for me so I was trying to prepare for that. Particularly as I had gotten into this doldrum after the phone call I had with my wife a couple of weeks ago that gave me hope. She had said that she was sad and knew she needed to go to therapy. Of course, now that she still hadn't and has since told me that she still doesn't want to be my wife because she doesn't trust me and is still hurting, it sent me spiraling down. I've been trying to pick myself up the last 2 days.
I do have faith that I'm working as hard as I can and want to succeed at saving the marriage. I don't have a lot of confidence that it will happen, but am sure that I am becoming a better person along the way (provided I don't have an emotional breakdown).
I think I see your point that being committed to my changes and the process of what I'm doing will lead to two possible outcomes (save the marriage and/or be a better person). I do have faith that the changes I'm making are the right thing to do and with either outcome I will be better off.
Am I getting that right?
Me 41 WAW 36 S 3&7 M 10 yrs W files D 1/9/09 W moves out 4/18 Lost job 6/15 New job 7/27 Disc PA 8/10 (started Nov 2008!) Confronted 8/11 Admits PA & appologies for hurt 9/11 Lost Job 11/13
