W O W you are like - my hero I need to kneel at your feet an jus suck up the LEARNING or something...

I did it all wrong with MY MIL, but yea I was also seriously betrayed by her in my mind and it just drove me nuts. I was seriously so upset... her son, my H, had an affair with his neice (her grand daughter my kids cousin!) i did tell her I did out the affair and ... well she seemed to just want to brush it all under the carpet. she cut off all contact with me and the kids when H walked out. then when i found out neice was in this country as H had brought her out here behind everyones backs I outed him and her AGAIN. and ONCE AGAIN i was betrayed - MIL did nothing and get this even took the neice 'about town' for two weeks. um she hadnt seen our kids since our breakup...

long story short i ended up short circuiting when H finally ran off to be with her in the UK and blasted MIL, sent nasty emails etc, really told her where to go. id been her DIL 16 years and she'd been in my house every weekend. i just cant forgive. in my case her betrayal is almost as big as H's. its a real red button for me, and when she sent a b'day card to my daughter last year i went OFF into SPACE. this woman hasnt so much as lifted a finger or called me or anything and then she sends a card to my 15 yo saying "id love to see you lets go shopping?" like i DONT EXIST?

i try hard to try to be forgiving but in truth im less forgiving of her than i am of H! and i dont want my kids around her. she knows well her son doesnt see the kids talk to them or pay support but SHE thinks what she can excuse that an suddenly act like the grandmother... no.

like you i also beleive H saw her seeing the OW with him as approval for his actions. i dont condone it. i dont care if it was her GD, my kids are he grandkids too and they were in crisis and they hsould have come first. im really unhappy and enraged still about her. i am not with H, im so done with him. but with her?

we're not done. i have a lot more to do and say if i ever get the chance. i know its wrong to be this angry at someone but ... im really really angry.

wishing i could find some of your maturity/compassion. i know this is so strange - probably i need therapy for it but dang i cant afford it - but id like to hurt her more than H. i already know hes going to pay in the long run.

When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.