is that a typo? Or are ye practicing yor pirate talk? LOL!
Yep.... The great thing about life is you can go with the flow. If he want's to work things out after D then there isn't any law that says you can't! America is great isn't it! And maybe if that happens it is the best time to do it. Tons of people work things out years later. Your a great person... just don't cut yourself short waiting on something unless your content.
But I understand MsM... I have conversations in the mirror all the time and can't decide if it is Jekyle or Hyde in the mirror I think I am in the "want to convince someone it wasn't all me" phase and can't figure out I am the only that needs to know that.I mean she (to her credit) is not attacking me in front of my daughter. My daughter has come to the thought that my shift work was to blame but I think that was all said long before the divorce stuff. so who really cares. Her closest friend and brother both have said she is looking for greener grass. So I don't need to prove anything. I just need to figure out the caustic things I did to the marriage and fix them so I don't repeat them.
Ah!!! Role models LOL!
My mom and dad divorced when I was 12. Remember watching my mom throw wine in my dads face. Dad have hives everywhere on his body due to nerves. He wanted to work on the marriage but mom said no. They seperated for about three months. She went to Colorado for a week. She came back and told my dad that she wanted to work on the marriage but while they were seperated my dad met my step mom. He decided somewhere along the way he was done.
He was on tranqulizers, mom was on tranquilizers. Remember my mom was on them and drinking one night and had a complete nervous breakdown. She started seeing visions of my dad and my soon to be step mom in the house and yard. Freaked me out completely. she spent two months in the mental ward and didn't even recognize my brother or I. It was like someone with alziemers.
She never even dated again to my knowldge. Dad married my step mom. They never spoke one word to each other until my marriage 24 years later. They lived in 6 hours away from each other... 24 years of me deciding who to spend Xmas with and felling guilty about not being with the other one. My step brother and step sister were like real brother and sister to me. mom never worked a real job and when I was 16 I decided to go live with my dad, to be with my step brother. Never knew at the time I cut $500 out of my mom's income. she ended up having to sell the house she was in. yeah, not really my fault but lot of guilt over that one.
I would say that one thing that hurt my marriage was I paid so much attention to my daughter and in some ways didn't pay enough attention to my wife. That came directly from being ignored by my father as a child (until I was a teen who isn't a burden) so I wasn't going to do that with my child but I forgot my wifes needs along the way.
Could go on but the point is you are right... great role models in some ways but lousy in others. And here I am in front of my daughter in all my glory....
No pity party here...life happens but yea... real great role model and one of the reasons I can say I really have some hard feelings toward my wife whenever I look at my daughter. I guess if I focus on just me I should be gratefull she left now. Gives me time to rebuild my life and get to a good place... but for my daughter I wish we could have worked this out....hmmpf!!!!!!
I think I am in the "want to convince someone it wasn't all me" phase and can't figure out I am the only that needs to know that.I mean she (to her credit) is not attacking me in front of my daughter. My daughter has come to the thought that my shift work was to blame but I think that was all said long before the divorce stuff. so who really cares. Her closest friend and brother both have said she is looking for greener grass. So I don't need to prove anything. I just need to figure out the caustic things I did to the marriage and fix them so I don't repeat them.
