How Do You Forgive?

[eternaloptimist]

I see lots of fear and anger coming out of your H. He is making threats that he may, or may not follow through with. If he will divorce you for "exposing" her, he will divorce you anyway. Only he knows what he is prepared to do.

It's up to you. Think about it. Be calm, and work with your social worker friend. Do not act in anger, and although it is hard, do it for the right right reasons, not for revenge.

Hi, 1hope. Wow, the wisdom and experiences ppl willingly share here never cease to amaze me! Thank you sincerely. I feel so grateful to have found this community.

I'm trying very hard to come to a place of acceptance with everything, regardless of ever knowing the whole truth. H keeps now calmly insisting that the EA never became a PA. I can move past that. So I have made a choice to believe him. I know everyone come to acceptance in their own way and time. But confronting the therapist over the weekend, in public no less, was very cathartic for me.

If I report the therapist, it will definitely not be from a place of revenge but rather social justice and doing the right thing. Ironically, social justice is in the social worker's Code of Ethics. H cannot see or think clearly about their "friendship" right now. After meeting her in person, I'm more convinced than ever that she should not be in the mental health profession. She was with her husband smiling one minute and the next flirting with other men. I watched her from a distance and it disgusted me. A person like that with unclear relationship boundaries is in no position to help other vulnerable people. She'll just continue to exploit them.

Thanks so much for your great advice and insights! I wish you peace and hope. (I put a post in the prayers section that you might like to read! It's about hope!)