You need to make a decision whether you can let that go or not, going forward it does no good to constantly worry about it. It sounds like you are still in the punishing stage, who cares who it was, would it have been better if it were a stranger, or your best friend, who cares, it was your husband, and now you must decide when you are going to start piecing your marriage back together, or just steam and let it to continue to go down hill.
