kalni.....I understand where mish is coming from. This forum is a very dangerous place. It is great in the beginning....around the time of the bomb. It opens your eyes. It helps stop the hemorrhage. It shows you some techniques to help you on your way to grow.

After this period of time, this forum can lead you down a bad path. It can keep you in a state of denial and holding on to a rotten apple.

This is not a criticism, Kalni, but, if you choose to stay with a man who doesn't care...doesn't show you respect..has NO interest in maintaining a healthy marriage, then, the day to day negative posts will just continue. Day to day positive posts about YOU are better and the pathway to total detachment from a WAS. They don't suddenly come home one day and say, "oh honey...what a fool I was...I love you just like I used to."

I try to be very careful to keep my own sitch from tainting my advice to others. But..I DO believe that if one chooses to stay and live in negativism...whether it be from fear, uncertainty or a decision to stand...you must find a place where you will be emotionally happy and free from the ills that the other person will try to inflict on you, whether it be intentional or otherwise.

I believe the majority of people who make their way to 'Piecing' are those that cut their wayward spouses loose and move on without them.

JMO.

Stay strong.

FIB

Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;