How can you heal from infidelity when your spouse vacillates about whether to rebuild or divorce? This is the pergatory I'm stuck in right now.
Emotional detachment is necessary. At a certain point your spouse has to either take responsibility for the M to heart, or not. It is intensely difficult for the betrayed spouse to watch the roller coaster of emotions the wayward spouse experiences as they pine over their lost lover. But it is a part of the process, so taking a step back, recognizing it, and focusing on your end goal is what you hope for.
Regardless of whether they want the M or not - they need to cut off contact completely from the lover so that they can let the fog clear.
In my case, there was no sex. It was all EA or that is what my H wants me to believe. His therapist was definitely trying to have an affair with him though. I have the evidence in an email. I already confronted her and, of course, she denies anything more than a friendship too.
All contact has been severed and he is now more remorseful than he was 2 weeks ago.
How do you emotionally detach?
Last edited by eternaloptimist; 06/02/0904:32 PM.
Me 39, H 41 M 17, T 21 Son, 4 Bomb 2.09, Two EAs Separated 8.4.09 My Long Story and First Postings
