OK... correct me if I am WRONG but didnt you say this guy is like, states away, so, therefore, one would suppose, the chance of getting physical isnt that huge.?? no/yes?
its all about physicality, I dont care how huge am EA is at the end of the day if it cant get physical its GOING TO COME TO AN END, sooner or later... thats just our biological makeup
i think yes you should be INSISTENT it ends I think yes you should make some hard core threats about MAKING it end (ie outing it, talking about it, confronting him). THAT MIGHT be enough. in either case you have to deal with it, and try to bring that to a head for your own peace.
i do think you have to be firm and tough but I also think you have to give her the chance, if its only EMOTIONAL and SUPPORT as you say (and it might be if hes far off) to give it the chance to die a natural death. but you have to do both things at once - be really FIRM and STRONG in telling her she must END it and COMMIT but also be forgiving and understanding of WHAT HAS PASSED as long as it ends.
to be totally clean with you I think in these situations of EA's that are UNLIKELY to develop above fantasy (ie distance) to just firmly demand it finishes or you confront and expose the entire thing to all... including to HIM... it can be frightening there is no doubts. so you can TRY it but you have to be really strong about it but not in a really "im going to get you" way. just in a "im fighting and prepared to fight hard" way. and DONT expose ANYTHING if you think SHE IS REALLY TRYING.
you seem to think she IS. if you do and you know hes miles away then yea it might be best to stop harping on it but keep insisting you want it over, and that you expect it to be over, rather than just hard coring and exposing it all RIGHT NOW. i wouldnt until I had threatened to do so a fair bit to see if that scare alone worked, in your sitch. it often has great results.
shes not responding to you bc shes still attached but it doesnt mean the end of all hope for you, shes a human being it takes time to detach from someone, but if you are the one THERE and consistent but not BEGGING, then where is HE, an EA can only carry on during communcations not during EVERY DAY. you win in that regard.
dont act needy dont act desperate act like "this is it or else". be a man about it. call her bluff! but dont go off doing something rash like say, telling her parents, when it MIGHT end just with the bluff. then she has something to be grateful for doesnt she. and so she should be.
When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.
