A little update of sorts. I've been reading up on some other situations on there is one thing that I keep reading over and over ... basically, that once the LBS gets to the point where they accept the situation and start acting like the marriage is over, things change. This has been rolling around in my head for the last few weeks. I've been hanging on emotionally, waiting for her to decide what she is going to do. That is no way to live.
Splitting up the finances is one step in that acceptance. I think I've been holding on to the idea that if we are connected financially, we'd still have a reason to talk to each other. Not a fun realization, but it is at least honest. I haven't heard a peep out of her in two weeks.
So here's my current internal debate ... I got a new job about a month before she walked out. The commute is pretty ridiculous (about an hour and a half each way). I've been thinking that if I really believed she wasn't coming back, I would move closer to work. I've been sticking around hoping that she'll come to her senses. My lease is up at the end of July. So I'm contemplating just moving and getting on with my life. If she wants to work on things, we can easily do that from 75 miles away. The down side to this is that I fear this will give her ammunition to say that "I left her." I become the bad guy. I'm the one who didn't want to stick around to make it work. It is the same with the divorce itself. I don't want it. There is nothing I can do to stop her from divorcing me. I'm just not going to be the one to file. Maybe I'm just buying into the MLC/WAW psychosis.
I like the town where I live right now, it is just so far away from work.
Not that it really matters, but her lease was up on May 1st. When we talked two weeks ago I asked what her plan was, she just said that her lease was up. She hadn't renewed and hadn't found some place else. Very, very vague.
