your right - and hello fellow aussie and guess what, ex is also in england with OW (weird!) men and women are DIFFERENT. therefore the way we handle things needs to be DIFFERENT. thats the only real problem I can see in the whole DB thing; applying it to both sexes from the beginning doesnt fit well with me.
For a start I can tell you this, at the beginning of an affair, with a WOMAN, lying it down HARD and bein TOUGH might win the day. but doing that with a MAN will make him get his dander up and he'll just take off even sooner to the much nicer and more understanding OW.
What worked on me did not work on him. so thats how I learnt that lesson and I'll stand by it too. Of course if an affair has been raging on forever and a day, its a bit late to apply 'early days' techniques. but discovered early it can definitely work.
I think its the opposite with men... what I SHOULD have done was to say "ok goodbye, so long and have a good life" and not shed a single tear and helped him move out. wish I had!
as i always like to say hindsight is awesome
When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.
