Then you have a great chance to make yourself better and show her that you understand. If you were as bad as you make you sound and she stayed with you for so long then I would say you have a great chance of making changes and her noticing!
But just keep in mind that we can't go back and change things in the past. I use to be one of those people that would lose a game (football) and relive it in my mind hundreds of times. Always thinking, "man if we would have just done this or that". I finally realized there wasn't anything I could do there except relive somehting I couldn't change.
You have a wonderful opportunity to change something you now realize you don't like. Your wife may not benefit but your kids will be better people for it. They will get a better life and that is a good thing. Right?
