New to this Community seeking advice

[JR09]

I called my boys tonight to say HI and also to say Hi to my WAW. It was great to listen to the boys. Then I talked to my W.
I inquired about her health and chitchated about when I could link up again with the boys since school is out. She said anytime I get to take time off work.

Then,out of the blue, my W said I have another 6 months, referring to the divorce proceedings which she filed end of JAN 09. Apparently she filed for an extension to keep the divorce in the courts. I don't know if she really filed for an extension. We haven't done anything about it since she filed. She said I have 6 months then I have to sign. I told her I didn't understand what options I had. She said she needs to finish "it".

Then, again out of the blue, she switched topics and reminded me to let her know when I get vacation time so we can link up for me to see the boys. Because I am in the military, it is not as easy to take time off. Plus my W lives with her parents for the past year,900 miles away...

I didn't say anything when my W brought up the divorce issue. I did my best to DB and not react to it at all, which I think is what my W expected me to do, trying to get me into an argument and reinforce her idea that it was OK to walk away. But I really kept my composure and didn't reply at all. I just said I was glad the boys and her were doing well, then I ended the conversation and said I had to go, then said good bye. She said Bye as well. And that was it for our conversation.

I remembered the DB technique to not get sucked into a fight on the phone and keep one's cool even if the WAW tries to get you to react. I thought I did well. After I hung up, I repeatedly kept reminding myself to NOT believe anything she says, which gave me hope and comfort this evening.

Any feedback from anybody? What else could I have said differently or better?

Food for thought. Separated for 11 months and still hanging in there.

JR09