It's not a guy thing, it's called human nature. True men and women communicate/think differently, but when it comes down to it, there are some things that can only be chalked up as human nature.
When someone you know, love and have been w/for some time does the things that they are doing, it is very hard to digest the information. They become foreign to us because the behaviors are so out of character from the people we knew. We've been hurt and rather than lash out at them, some of us tend to step back and just not have that much contact w/them and when we do, it is uncomfortable talking to them for they are different in personality and yes, we aren't even sure how they will react to what we are telling them. So, no it's not just a "guy thing", it's the same w/both sexes.
If you are still missing your spouse a lot, then you are not ready for the dating scene. You first, need to find a way to heal and accept that he's gone for a while, in some cases forever, and then find your balance once again. Once you can be happy living on your own and like the person you are, then you are ready for dating. You do not want to carry all of your old baggage into a new relationship.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
