Today he started to complain about not having enough time to be together and all the running around between places just to spend time. I just listened... and then he stopped and reminded me that he knows it is because of what he did and he isn't really complaining. He knows it was his behavior that put him in this position. Then I did speak up and reminded him that it was hard on me too - his behavior put "us" in this position. He immediately agreed that it was hard for me especially after all he did to me.
Coming along. I am still getting used to "catching" my reactions and what an unexpected change for me - to really hear that it wasn't my fault. You cannot imagine the relief and freedom I feel when he reminds.
In thinking about "our" problems from before it seems that many of them are clearing up. It is such a surprise to realize that all the arguments were related to him wanting to drink and not about the issue. He keeps remarking about how much we really do have in common - before we both thought we were incompatible but now - we're ok.
