no kidding cathy. and i don't know if you deal with this, but i certainly do. the foolishness i sometimes feel because i have stayed. like "what the heck am i here for? i deserve better than this!"
i never believed in a million years i would put up with what i have. and sometimes i hate myself for it. there was a post somewhere here that the betrayer said to the betrayed as they were reconciling "you have to forgive yourself for forgiving me" or something to that effect.
i don't think i have forgiven myself yet. that is why it still continues to hurt
